True Story
Use words!
On adults1
Mountains grow in strange places2
Angles and angles, def heard that one before 3
Progross 4
Spittle 5
Try… more thought…6
… almost not worth thinking about …
I don’t remember this English teacher/slash librarian’s name, she was universally known as ‘Dragon Lady’ tho. One aspect of this epithet was her absolute rule of ‘No Hats in The Library’. Having noticed that this rule applied not at all to any girl, ever, for whatever reason upon spying girls wearing hats in said library with Dragon Lady attending I would find it a good time to read one of the many interesting things in there, hat in it’s designated place. Her effective range (you are supposed to read the footnotes as you go ;),,, ) was two meters at the least, but as her DPS7 scaled logarithmic-like, the hunched over the shoulder “One is not allowed to wear a hat in here, please remove your hat” did hit hard, prepared as I was. You have to breathe to say, “Well, those folks at that table there, all three, they are wearing hats Mrs X”.
“That is different, they are girls.”
“But, why?”
“Because it is different, that’s why”
“But….”
I am sure I complied, eventually. Even the most heroic of young boys can only take so much. Tho I think the other women librarians got a kick out of this exchange, they never suggested hence that I remove my sweet-ass Blue Jays ball cap.
At least I learned some things in high school.
Mount of the Moon, or Moont of the Moon? Such similarities aside, somehow the small library in my home town had a great old manual on palmistry (tho that particular town had stamped upon it very little, and it was no longer in residence when I visited the place as a young adult): https://www.auntyflo.com/palmistry/mount-luna
OK, I admit, Dragon Lady was ‘right’ here, despite how many style guides suggest one write out the numbers fromeone to nine in full, and then use numerals henceforth, ‘ninety degree's’ makes better poetry, as words go. But the number of technical drawings that write this out in full I am sure still approaches zero….
In grade four, I had a grade nine spelling level. ‘Tis but a miner boast to claim mine has steadily progressed to at least a solid seven.
Seriously? This English teacher was not a young gal no more, this is farm country. Could it be so hard to consider the near future of one hoisted off in such a manner? Sure things perhaps are more often spit out, but man-sized pointy needles have such a tendency to split, with fairly fearsome results for the splitee. OK, y, that’s my latent sexism, women used such tools as well, but as a sexist sort, I’ll suggest it likely they usually used even manlier tools, much wider in the head, and more oft were found to be splitting wood. I think I was in the right time but the wrong place to yet know that ‘spittin rhymes’ was something done on city streets before I was born.
Right back at’cha Dragon Lady. Named so because ‘death breath’ was far too common a schoolyard insult and lacked entirely the poetry (note The Capitals) required to convey the clinical nature of this one’s halitosis. Having met this exact personage so many times literally within the world of books and stories since, I can only assume that The One True God does indeed take His Sunday’s off to rest from stamping out the sort of lunatic psychopaths required to work His whole rape, pillage, ravage, castrate, defenestrate, have torn to bit by dogs, etc thing (etc: the… whatever you call it when you get your dad nice and drunk so it is no sin when he ‘knows’ your younger sister, for many nights in a row. I think she went first, y? Shows some class at least, but SWEET Jesus fucking and also H. Christ that book has the most confusing cast of characters). On Sundays, Coyote and all his relations must step in to stamp these folks out in great numbers between all the mad poets and easily damaged dreamers they beget… such easy marks we are, indeed, what fun that must be to fuck with us!
DPS = Damage Per Second, def ranks in the top two for stats required when rolling the dice for this sort of encounter….